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Custom by Me

September 2013



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Custom by Me

FIC--Meeting Daddy (outtake from Changing Perceptions)

Title: Meeting Daddy
Rating: R for language and sexual reference
Parent Story: Changing Perceptions, chapter three
Prompt from kentish_queen
Prompt:  You should know what I'd pick. 'Changing Perceptions'. I want to know what happened that time in Lily's dad's office, the first time he met James, whilst James was pretty much going at it with his youngest daughter.
Betas: nathaniel_hp and thanfiction  Thanks, boys!!

Meeting Daddy

Without saying a word, she shook her head and closed the distance between them, touching his lips with hers. He was startled at first but then kissed her back, careful to keep his ardour in check. The last thing he wanted to do was get carried away. They were, after all, in her parents' study…well, more specifically, her father's.

She opened her mouth and their tongues met. He moved his hand from her thigh to the back of her head and held her to him. Lily moaned and it fuelled desire within him that James could barely hold in check. All the years of pent-up desire and sexual frustration threatened to burst out of him as they kissed there on the sofa. Somehow, she ended up in his lap with one of his hands on her bum and the other cupping one of her breasts. It was blissful.

That is, until her father interrupted them.

"Pardon me?"

I fell onto the floor and James swore brilliantly.


I tugged my shirt down and stood up awkwardly. James remained on the sofa, obviously flustered, his face red as he shifted in his seat. I hoped that the magnificent hard-on that I had sat on not thirty seconds ago had dwindled. His eyes were wide in embarrassment, and I didn't have to be a Legilimens to know that he wished he were anywhere but here.

"Lily," Dad said in a tone that reminded me of when I was caught opening my Christmas presents in November. "I assume this is James?" He crossed his arms over his chest.

Shit. He only crosses his arms like that when he's about to blow up or seethe silently. My money was on seething.

James leapt up from the sofa, swallowed purposefully, and extended his hand to my father.

"Mister --" James squeaked, cleared his voice and started again. "Mister Evans. Nice to meet you."

Dad hesitantly took James' hand, then shook it vigorously. I could tell by looking at their forearms that they were engaged in some sort of gripping contest. Men.

"Easy to see where Lily gets her good looks," James said brightly, wearing a crooked grin.

I cringed and slapped my forehead. He's digging himself a nice, deep grave. Hope was beginning to fade quickly. Dad released his hand and recrossed his arms.

"Make sure you tell her mother that." Dad eyed him warily and James' eyes widened as he realized his gaff. "And it appears that you appreciate those good looks as well."

"Er, uh...Your daughter is very attractive, sir," James replied, his face still red. The poor boy looked mortified, and all I could do was stand there while my father went into military mode.

"And I assume that your parents brought you up correctly when dealing with attractive young ladies?"

"Dad!" I exclaimed and he shot me a glance that made me feel as if I was eight again.

"Yes. They're old, so yes, they...Bring…flowers…?" James put his hands behind his back murmured a few words and withdrew a bouquet of daisies, handing them to me. "Hold…doors open. Well, I just charm 'em to stay open. You know… wizard." James smiled lopsidedly, hoping to lighten the mood in the room.

Dad was still not impressed. James cleared his throat, ready to say something else. Dear God, let him shut up!

"Yes, that is important."

"And, of course," James began, looking extremely serious, "they taught me to keep my pecker in my pants until we're married."

Someone, kill me now!

Once the words were out of his mouth, James realized what he'd said. He had never been one for thinking before he spoke, and this trait certainly didn't earn him any points with my father. With his mouth open, James looked at me, silently begging me to rescue him from the situation.

I looked at him pointedly and mouthed, 'Just leave,' hoping he would understand what I meant.

"What? What'd you say, Lily?"

Did I mention that subtlety was never one of his strong suits, either?

"I think we're done for today, James," I said, emphasizing my words carefully. James finally cottoned on and began gathering his things.

"I should say so." Dad turned on his heels and left the room, leaving the door open.

"I get my looks from my dad? Fuck, James, do you think with that brain?" I shoved my own things into my bag, careful not to touch his fingers.

"Guess I lost too much blood flow. It was all down south, you know!" he spat back.

"Well, then you should have been thinking a lot clearer, since that's obviously where your brain is located, Potter!" I crossed my arms over my chest, knowing that's where his attention lay.

"It's all your fault, you know!"

"Me? Who was the one with his hand on my tit?"

"Well, who was grinding against my dick like some—"

"Don't finish that!"

"You told me to, and I quote, 'Squeeze it, squeeze it!'" His bag was packed, and he swung the strap onto his shoulder, taking a step toward the door. I stepped in front of him.

"Well, if you didn't look so bloody hot I wouldn't—"

He cut me off by kissing me again, deeply, massaging my lips apart. I had no choice to comply. It really was unfair how skillful he was at kissing. My brain kept telling me to stop, but my body—damn, my body—was betraying me, causing me to melt into him as the kiss went on and on and…

"Goodbye, James," came my father's booming voice from the kitchen, which it so happened, was right across the hall from where we stood.

The two of us bent to retrieve his bag, knocking our heads together. Instead of crying out in pain, we both laughed. James looked at me and rubbed his head as he stood. Laughter came from behind us and I turned to find my parents hiding behind the newspaper.

"I—I'll see you on the first then," I stammered.

"Uh huh. So, well, we should probably get there early…you know, to get ready for the meeting?" He swallowed purposefully again.

"Yeah…yeah definitely want to meet you early." At his raised eyebrow, I blushed and added, "To get ready for the meeting, that is."

His head bobbed incessantly. "Sure."

"Prat. Go. Leave. I'll see you on the first," I said lightly, and swatted him on the arse. It was James' turn to blush. I laughed as I opened the door and ushered him out.

"Goodbye, Mister Evans!" he shouted before shutting the door shut behind him.

I could just make out my father's voice from the kitchen.

"And I'm sure I'll be seeing you again, James."

I certainly hoped so.


Ah the tradition is starting early, I see...and they're on a sofa, too! LOL.

This was great, I loved it!
yep...sure is
I like the arguing. Really gives their personalities into the relationship. Like they are still the same people who hated eachother in fifth year and yet now they can take out their sexual tension. Good addition
I loved it! I almost spat fat coke all over the office computer!

Poor, James. I would have been mortified if I was him. I think you got him spot on, opening his mouth before engaging his brain and all.

Thanks, D! Love you!
oh yes

In a way, he's as pitiful as his son...
I really don't know who I should feel more sorry for: James, because I don't know if he could make it even worse, or Lily - after all she had to stay and face her father again.
I love how you make them switch from arguing to a civilized conversation but it's all the time laced with innuendos. Ah, to be a teenager again...
oh the UST is just palpable, ain't it?
Hahahaha that was hilarious! I was expecting Lily's dad to be way harsher, but I really liked the way you wrote him.

I also love the banter you have between Lily and James. It's so natural and unforced and totally reflects their personalities.
You know, it is really mean to write such a funny story without giving any warning!!!I was sitting there reading this story and then suddenly a sentence like <"Easy to see where Lily gets her good looks," James said brightly, wearing a crooked grin.> or <"they taught me to keep my pecker in my pants until we're married."> came, which totally cracked me up. You might think that is what a good story is about and you might be right, but not in room full of other people who start staring at the freak with the laptop!!!! :-)
Keep writing! Loved it!
i'm assuming that's a good review...you are way too funny
Well observed Sherlock!! I think "loved it" might suggest a positive response. Have nice weekend!
*Grin* I love that fighting which is a couple's "chemistry". Some Petunia action, perhaps?